Another rant = badly written entry.

I've sunk to being a lower lifeform, I think. My thoughts no longer pricked at intelligent conversation or analysis. These few days have been consigned to levelling up my dwarven hunter on world of warcraft amidst sitting in a mindless stupor in the dump I call my room.

Proud to say, he's level 30 now. 10 more levels and I get a mount.

Right. I like the game but it simply saps away time and thought like a black hole. These few days have been a quagmire of hours of gaming, fruitless dealings on the phone for internship positions.. of which all my applications have been rejected.. and catching few hours of sleep here and there. Here, on my blog.. to my friends.. allow me to rant that despite having a first class honours GPA, solid CCA achievements and a scholarship to boot.. I can't get a position to be some decent department's "do-all-boy". Suck!

Like Kian Wee said, I'm starting to see shadows and spectres behind the rejections.

I think its not what you do.. it's who you know and who your dad is.

Two islands in this sea of wretched living. The first was catching Pensyair Bersepah (i think thats what they're called.. closest translation i can come up with would be.. mess of poets?) during Gema Temasek a week ago. Spoken word and poetry with percussion, guitar, flute. Honestly, it was both a highlight and a mistake to have them during Gema Temasek, which was malay sketch and dance put up by malay temasek junior college students. The poetry made the jc theatre piece wrapped around the pensyair bersepah performance seem pale and weak in comparison. But amazing effort for theatre at JC level. I can't imagine the SAJC malay kids my year attempting even a quarter of it.

But oh, spoken word. The beauty of stepping up onto a stage and simply saying it as it is.. inspiring. Inspired.

The other island was going to teater ekamantra's piece last night. Mentah 3: Barisan Puteri Puteri.

After a year of watching student theatre productions, I was amazed at the calibre of the performers. Not the best but impressive nonetheless. The show was in 3 pieces and the first two had feminist undertones. It was a good piece of luck to have bumped into Fezhah at the coffeeshop situtated opposite substation. She wrote the second piece and invited me to the show. The second piece struck quite a chord with me.. it's title was "the story of Sita as told by she". It struck a particular chord because it featured 3 different women in a similar scenario and one being Sita of the Ramayana. Having done Wayang Ramayana last year, I immediately recognized the scenes and the message. I only found the "undergraduate girl" part of the play a little detached from the rest. I felt that was Fezhah trying to communicate herself through the play but somehow it didn't seem to flow with the rest.

I'm all praises for Mentah 3. Good thing too that Yumi was spontaneous enough to agree to come along to watch. We hung out at Timbre with Syed and Sofia for abit after that. Friday night was fun.

Oh. Saturday morning was interesting too. 5 hours after I got home on Friday night, I was on my way to school to be a tarian (malay dance) dancer for this video that was being prepared for this year's convocation. Quite an experience to come down with more than half my brain still shut down.. learn dance steps and then execute them almost immediately around umbrella-wielding students in a field. Surreal, I know. Need to get that video.

And need to get a real life. No one owes me one. I'm going to get out and do something meaningful.. and not going to let internship rejections and the fact that I got kicked out of a band by a friend that I thought I was close to get me down.

You just watch.