jolly pristine annum everyone!

Happy New Years.. I just woke up.

Probably speaks of some crazy ass party I've had, to have me wake up in the afternoon of the second day of the year but if you know me you'd know i'm swearing off clubbing. In truth, my new years can hardly be described as wild but was instead meaningful time spent with friends. (everybody go aawww....)

The last evening of 2005 began with a trip to Boon Lay of all places to a place that Ben described over the phone as "opposite Boon Lay CC". I swear Leaven Trait performs in all the weirdest places ever. So thanks to a brand new SBS service to Jurong from the doorsteps of my house as well as locality maps in interchanges, I finally found myself before a very heartland stage not very far from a relative's house (which I used to think as a kid was the other end of the earth). Some teen band was on stage croaking out a very failed attempt at pop punk but the kids will get better in time and getting stage time at such an early age will definitely help them so I begrudged them my ears for battering. Following that was a hip-hop dance performance by six girls which in my opinion were so young they really should be at home rather than gyrating on a stage. I think there were so young, chikopek apeks were turned off and that takes a lot.

Leaven Trait was up next and the performance was quite hilarious. The drum set was afflicted with a case of the "sliding bass drum" and while Ben was quite desperately trying to play.. the bass drum kept trying to get away from him. Roslan kicked the bass drum into position while Joel did a karate kick and knocked down a cymbal. Quite the destructive rebel band haha.

Having little more than 45 minutes to rush down to Marina Bay for the next gig was quite a rush (get it?). Exhilarating peak crowd traffic. Waiting in line for 5 whole minutes just to get onto the damn escalators. The pavements were packed like a Mango store on 50% discount so we took a path less travelled to get to the stage on time. The bus lane.

The stage was good with video and solid sound. I was regretting not having a performance too on that day. Leaven Trait burned the stage that night. Like to little charcoal bits. Burnt. I remember feeling very proud of these guys. What a show.

We stuck around the backstage cuz the whole esplanade was so packed with people. We stood there, arms around shoulders, our feet half sunk in wet mud.. and waited for the fireworks. It was a beautiful feeling of companionship, bittersweet memories and hopeful expectations of a blessed, exciting new year. A beautiful moment.

I was mentally exorcising my demons and setting the rollercoaster of a year behind me. For a whole year, I gave everything to my school. I met and surpassed my own expectations. I dreamt, strived and tasted achievement. And at that peak, I stepped off and exited the plan. I've had quite a number of blows too. Blows that hit hard especially when everything seemed to be going perfect. The year catapulted me up and then pulled my head from the clouds and put my feet back on the ground and made me remember who I was and made me realize who the important people that really knew me were. Being there with them at the moment was something I could truly say was important.

We made our way to the Glass House at Raffles Place and hung out in typical DYL fashion, all over the floor. Food, drinks, jokes, games, failed mentos-coke experiments, random chats. I'm always curious where the time flies to everytime we do this. I'm almost positive that for some reason we attract more gravitons and more time acts on us or something to that effect. Joel's the physics expert.. maybe he can look into this as a field of study.

Keeping in tradition, we had our roti kaya and half-boiled eggs at dawn. It was good. The plan following that was to head over to Charlene's house but a number of us could hardly stand so only Syed and I went over. Roslan and Joel stopped by their houses before heading over to Charlene's. Technically, we were supposed to be trying out marijuana coffee. This being a public blog I would say that the coffee was a hoax and the only thing the "marijuana" did was to make it a little bit more bitter. I mean it cleared Singapore customs. Of course, we will keep mum about the actual effects of the thing.

So headed home at noon on the 1st of January, feeling the perks of staying up past 24hours and a bellyfull of coffee. thick, bitter coffee. yay. hit home, cooked noodles, helped my sis dry the laundry and hit bed at 4pm. and i woke up at 2am in the morning.. which is where the fun part of this blog starts.

i was having a nightmare. i can't remember the details but it was quite bad. I woke up feeling a presence. this not being the first time, i just kept my eyes shut and prayed the ayatul kursi. The next thing that happened is quite a challenge to describe. My body became really really tense like as if someone screamed really really loud next to me but there wasn't any sound. My face reacted like it was in a hurricane but there wasn't a breath of wind. My eyes were clenched tight on their own and I felt a curious feeling moving from the right side of my clenched eyes to my left. Like a butterfly tracing its wings against my skin or a fingernail. It lasted the duration of the prayer and for some reason other prayers did not induce the same reaction. I mumbled the prayer again and it happened again but this time the presence left.. but I was still frozen. I kept still and prayed for about 5 minutes, I could feel my handphone in my right hand. I wanted to dial someone but I couldn't move. I've been disturbed before but this was really quite strong. I've always wondered if these disturbances were really merely some natural phenomenon created by one's brain or body reactions. My thoughts were interrupted when I felt that thing, whatever it is, return.. I could feel it almost over my face. My heart was already beating but I could feel it begin to race and eventually beat like crazy. I have never felt this feeling so strong before and my heart felt really ready to explode. At that point I really couldn't take it any more. I opened my eyes, sat up and shouted "HEY! What the f**k!". There was nothing around. which really was a good thing but it made me wonder if i imagined the whole thing. if i really did imagine it, i guess i can imagine myself to a heart attack. i was positively shaking and i tried to call my mum but she didn't pick up. i called ben thinking that he might be awake. he wasn't but he did pick up which i am really quite grateful. we talked and it was good. i turned the lights on and got rid of the shakes. thanks ben.

i stayed up with music and videos and doodling. I slept again at dawn and only just woke up. Helluva way to start the year don't you think? the next time anything like that happens to me at night, I'm going to just try to open my eyes immediately and face it. And ask it what it's problem is. honestly, tsk. maybe it wants a new year party too.